My Midlife Brain, ChatGPT and the Myth of Intellectual Superiority

The midlife brain is a fascinating phenomenon.

On some days, I feel like my brain is somewhere in the dumps or down the drain. There's this layer of fog, and while I know what I want to say, finding the right words and putting everything into coherent sentences can feel unnecessarily difficult.

That's when ChatGPT comes in handy. I have the thoughts and ideas, but I need help organising them into something that actually makes sense.

On other days, my mind is incredibly clear. In fact, sometimes it's racing so fast that I have multiple lines of thought running simultaneously, and they all seem to get tangled up into one giant ball.

Again, ChatGPT comes in handy. This time, not because I can't think clearly, but because I have so many thoughts that I need help untangling them, connecting the dots and making sense of everything.

I'm still the same person, who functions with the same brain, but on different days, I'm facing different challenges. Welcome to (peri)menopause.

And this brings me to...

What I notice on LinkedIn lately.

I've come across some posts where people declare that their writing is entirely AI-free. Some even question those who use generative AI to produce beautifully written postings.

This makes me wonder. Since when did NOT using AI become a measure of intellectual superiority?

Don't get me wrong. If you enjoy writing everything yourself, that's wonderful.

What I find questionable is the implied notion that people who use AI are somehow less authentic, less capable or less intellectually competent.

Here's what I think the discussion should be.

There are different ways of using AI.

1. Outsourcing thinking: Asking AI to generate opinions or arguments you barely understand, then publishing them without questioning or evaluating the output.

2. Augmenting thinking: Using AI to challenge your assumptions, explore different perspectives, identify weaknesses in your arguments or help untangle complicated thoughts.

3. Supporting communication: Having your own ideas but using AI to improve the clarity, structure, grammar or flow of how you express them.

The above describes how I think about the different ways people use AI. You may have a different opinion; that's fine.

Personally, I find myself moving between augmenting thinking and supporting communication, depending on what my brain decides to do that day.

At the same time, of course I don't dismiss that AI-generated content comes with legitimate concerns about accuracy, originality and accountability.

But what I'm referring to in this case is about ordinary, day-to-day social media posts, not academic publications or research papers.

Stop the intellectual judgement.

A post written entirely without AI can still be generic, poorly reasoned or completely devoid of substance.

To be fair, a beautifully written AI-assisted post doesn't automatically mean the person behind it has nothing original to contribute.

I don't think using AI makes someone intellectually inferior, just as refusing to use AI doesn't make someone intellectually superior.

In my opinion, what matters is whether you can think critically, articulate your position and take ownership of what you publish.

At the end of the day, I still can defend the thoughts and opinions as mine, and I remain responsible for whatever I choose to put out there.

ChatGPT helps me find the words when my brain is foggy on certain days or untangle the 101 thoughts running through my head on other days. And occasionally, it challenges me enough to make me reconsider what I thought I knew.

Does that make me intellectually inferior to someone who doesn't use AI?

I certainly don't think so.

We should stop judging people's intellectual capabilities based on the tools they use and start paying more attention to the substance of what they're actually saying.

Michael Olise Got Me Thinking. Perhaps I Care Too Much About What Others Think

First, it was Harry Kane who inspired me to reflect on parenting. Now, it's Michael Olise who's got me thinking about work and, well, myself. Haha.

I've been rather amused by the attention surrounding Olise lately, particularly his nonchalant attitude towards interviews, publicity and marketing.

In September 2026, his remarkably brief post-match interview went viral. When asked how he scored such brilliant goals, he essentially replied that he shoots and the ball either goes in or doesn't.

Hahaha!

Here's a footballer who seems perfectly comfortable being himself. He doesn't appear particularly interested in impressing anyone or explaining himself more than necessary.

Of course, being a professional footballer comes with responsibilities beyond playing football. I believe he understands that, and from what I've read, his club and he are working towards fulfilling those expectations.

But what I find refreshing is that he doesn't seem to feel the need to completely change his personality just to fit everyone's expectations.

And that got me thinking.

The Uncomfortable Part of Being in Management

Recently, I've had to make some difficult decisions and initiate uncomfortable conversations at work. I've always believed that trust comes from consistency, accountability and demonstrated behaviour. I also believe people deserve opportunities to learn, improve and prove themselves. I blogged about my experience here: Competence, Likeability and Trust Are Three Different Things.

But I'd be lying if I said I never questioned myself afterwards.

Did I handle that correctly? Was I too harsh? Did I ruffle a few feathers unnecessarily? What if my judgement was wrong? I spoke about my reactions on my LinkedIn post.

I got to say that I've started seeing some encouraging changes. Yet, even with these positive developments, I sometimes find myself revisiting those uncomfortable conversations and wondering whether I could have done things differently.

Maybe I Care Too Much About What Others Think

Perhaps that's why Olise fascinates me.

Not because I want to become indifferent to what people think. I still care about how my decisions affect others, and I certainly don't believe that having good intentions automatically makes every decision right.

But I'm beginning to realise that I don't need to constantly justify myself or seek reassurance that everyone agrees with my approach.

I can be firm and still be fair. I can trust my judgement and still be open to being wrong. I can acknowledge where I need to improve without feeling that I have to change who I am entirely.

And perhaps I can learn to be a little more comfortable with the possibility that not everyone will understand or agree with me.

I Guess I Just Need A Little Less Second-Guessing

After all, the goal isn't to be liked by everyone. It's to do my job responsibly, make informed decisions and remain willing to learn.

So, thank you, Michael Olise, for this rather unexpected reminder.

Well, well, well. Who would have thought I'd be getting life lessons from footballers lately? 😂⚽

A Parenting Reflection Inspired by Harry Kane's Ballon d'Or Win

Harry Kane won the 2026 Men's Ballon d'Or!

Many football fans were genuinely happy for him. Some even commented that Kane's win felt like Robert Lewandowski and all the other deserving footballers who had never won the award were finally getting their moment too.

I thought that was quite an intriguing sentiment.

Source: meetunnadkat

But what really got me thinking was my youngest son telling me that he was thrilled Harry Kane won.

Now, I don't know exactly why he was so happy. Maybe he simply likes Kane as a footballer. But knowing my boy and the challenges he faces, particularly with his physical stature, I wonder whether he sees a little bit of himself in Kane's story.

Not Every Child Is a Messi or Lamine Yamal

Let's be realistic. Footballers like Lionel Messi and Lamine Yamal are extremely rare. They are exceptional talents who were already attracting attention at a very young age.

Most children who love football are not going to be like them. And that's okay.

My youngest son loves football. He does face challenges with his physical stature, whereby he's considerably smaller than many children his age.

In football, physical stature does matter. Of course, there are smaller players who are technically brilliant, but when you're a child playing against other children who are taller, stronger and faster, the physical differences can be quite obvious.

I'm not going to pretend otherwise. Just like many other children who play the sport, he needs to put in a lot of effort to become better.

But he enjoys football. And as his mother, I think that's a good enough reason to continue supporting his interest.

Harry Kane Didn't Exactly Have a Glorious Start

One of the things I find interesting about Kane's career is that he wasn't always considered a promising footballer.

He was released by Arsenal's academy when he was a young boy. He was also reportedly smaller than many of his teammates during his early years.

Even after joining Tottenham Hotspur, he didn't immediately become a superstar. He went through several loan spells at Leyton Orient, Millwall, Norwich City and Leicester City before finally establishing himself at Tottenham.

If you look at his career now, it's easy to forget that there was a time when he wasn't necessarily the player everyone expected to succeed.

You can read about his story on this IG post and this one too.

Of course, hindsight is a wonderful thing. Now that Kane has won the Ballon d'Or, we can look back at his journey and talk about perseverance, determination and hard work.

But imagine being his parents when he was eight or nine years old and Arsenal decided he wasn't good enough for their academy.

At that point, nobody could have known that he would eventually become one of the world's best strikers.

His father apparently encouraged him to keep playing football instead of treating the rejection as the end of the road.

I think that's the part of Kane's story that resonates most with me as a parent.

Because when your child is still young, you really don't know how things will turn out.

Being Smaller Doesn't Mean He Should Have Fewer Opportunities

This is probably the most personal part of the story for me.

Because of my son's growth challenges, I'm very conscious of the fact that he may not be able to compete physically with some of his peers, at least for now. And yes, it does concern me sometimes.

I don't want him to become discouraged simply because other children are bigger or stronger. Neither do I want him to believe that being physically smaller means he's automatically less capable.

But I also have to be realistic.

There will be situations where physical differences put him at a disadvantage. There may be opportunities that he doesn't get, or teams that he doesn't make.

I can't protect him from every disappointment.

What I can do is make sure that I don't become another person who limits him before he's even had the chance to try.

If he wants to play football, let him play. If he needs extra practice, we'll find ways to help him. If he struggles with something, we'll work on it.

And if one day he decides that football is no longer something he wants to pursue, that's fine too.

I don't want to decide his future based on how tall he is today.

Interestingly, Kane has spoken about being one of the smaller players when he was young before going through a growth spurt.

Now, I'm not saying my son will follow the same path. His growth challenges are something we're addressing separately, and every child's development is different.

But it is a useful reminder that children develop differently, physically and in terms of their abilities.

What we see at nine or ten years old isn't necessarily what we'll see at fifteen or twenty.

So yes, I'm happy Harry Kane won the Ballon d'Or too.

Not because I expect my son to follow in his footsteps, but because Kane's story is a reminder that not everyone starts out as the obvious favourite.

And as parents, perhaps we should be a little more patient with children who need more time to find their footing.

After all, we're raising children, not scouting for the next Ballon d'Or winner. Haha.

Harry Kane's Men's Ballon d'Or Win Speech

The part of his speech that I find meaningful:

"For any young boy or girl wanting to achieve their dreams, anything is possible with hard work when no one else is watching. To go through the ups and downs, to learn through resilience, determination and self-belief. Like I said, anything is possible.

My journey, it wasn't straightforward. I wasn't the kid who went straight to the top. I had to experience the downs. I experienced a lot of long moves. I had to fight my way to be the very best right now, and hope that can give you inspiration as well."

- Harry Kane - 

Can ChatGPT Be My Personal Stylist? A Plus-Size Petite Experiment

Have You Heard of Personal Styling?

About 6 or 7 years ago, I had a personal colour consultation with a personal stylist friend, who told me I belonged to the Warm Spring colour season.

Now it is late 2026, and I start to wonder whether that assessment still applies because I'm now older and heavier. Haha.

And while we're at it, could ChatGPT help me figure out my personal style without having to engage another stylist?

So, I decided to run an experiment using AI.

Now I'm a Sage and a Mystic.

Wait, what is this? ChatGPT started the analysis by pointing me to the feminine archetypes questionnaire on Traitprint, which categorises personality characteristics into 12 archetypes.

My results were pretty interesting.

• The Sage: Wisdom, clarity and quiet authority.
• The Mystic: Intuition, depth and the inner world.
• The Lover, Rebel, Queen and Huntress: A four-way tie for the next position.

I wasn't particularly surprised by Sage. I do enjoy questioning things, understanding how they work and looking for evidence before drawing conclusions.

The Mystic archetype, on the other hand, is used to describe introspection, trusting one's intuition and seeking deeper meaning. And I do trust my gut feelings quite a lot.

Of course, these archetype questionnaires aren't scientifically validated personality assessments. I treated the results as an engaging exercise in self-reflection rather than a definitive description of who I am.

From Feminine Archetypes to Personal Style

ChatGPT suggested that my Sage-Mystic combination could translate into a style that was understated, sophisticated and slightly unconventional.

It even gave my style an identity: The Intuitive Elegant. Quite atas-sounding, isn't it? Haha.

According to this interpretation, the Sage influence favours clean lines, structure and timeless pieces, while the Mystic adds depth through colours, textures and subtle accessories.

I rather liked the idea.

After all, I've always been drawn to looking effortlessly polished without appearing overdressed.

But there's a difference between admiring a particular aesthetic and being able to wear it comfortably, which brings me to the next obvious challenge.

The Plus-Size Petite Problem

If you're familiar with the combination of plus size and petite, you'll probably understand why finding flattering clothing isn't always straightforward.

Many petite styling recommendations seem designed for slim women with a flat tummy and a small waist, while plus-size fashion often assumes a taller and voluptuous frame.

So where does that leave someone who is both petite and plus-size? Add a fuller midsection in midlife, and things become even more complicated.

So over the years, I've developed some fairly specific clothing preferences.

I love pencil skirts, particularly knee-length and ankle-length ones. I also wear fitted pants, usually paired with long, loose tops that provide coverage around my stomach and bottom.

Dresses? Not really my thing. I almost always feel frumpy in them.

Heels? No, thank you. I only wear sneakers or ballet flats any day.

I even told ChatGPT about all my preferences and current stylings. Surely all this information would help it understand my style better, right?

Well, not immediately.

AI Keeps Dressing Me Up Like a Slim Woman

Here's where the experiment became irritating.

Despite knowing my height, body proportions and clothing preferences, ChatGPT repeatedly showed me styling examples featuring slim petite women.

But were they representative of my body type? NO.

Eventually, I pointed it out myself to ChatGPT, as I was getting impatient.

To its credit, ChatGPT acknowledged the oversight and revised its recommendations to consider the actual challenges of dressing a plus-size petite frame.

That was probably the most useful moment of the entire exercise.

It basically shows that personalised recommendations aren't necessarily personal just because an algorithm has been fed information about you.

Sometimes, you still need to challenge the recommendations before they become relevant.

So, What Did ChatGPT Recommend Eventually?

After quite a lengthy conversation, we arrived at a style profile that actually made sense to me.

The colour direction remained Warm Spring, based mainly on my previous professional consultation.

As for my wardrobe, the recommendations became much more practical.

Instead of suggesting dresses or oversized clothing, ChatGPT focused on what I already enjoy wearing: pencil skirts, fitted trousers, relaxed but structured blouses, comfortable footwear and simple accessories.

It suggested experimenting with warm ivory, deep teal, chocolate brown, caramel and coral rather than relying entirely on black.

Black, by the way, has long been one of my preferred colours, mainly because I find it useful for drawing less attention to my midsection.

The most useful advice wasn't about changing my personal style completely. It was about paying closer attention to garment proportions, shoulder fit, fabric drape, blouse length and waistband comfort.

In other words, work with what I like instead of trying to turn me into someone else.

So, Can ChatGPT Really Replace a Personal Stylist?

After this experiment, my answer would be this: Not entirely.

ChatGPT was useful for brainstorming outfit combinations, exploring colour palettes and helping me articulate my preferences, but it also made assumptions.

It initially overlooked my body proportions when providing visual examples, and some suggestions were more generic.

A qualified personal stylist can assess fabric, fit, proportions and how different garments actually look on a person. ChatGPT cannot fully replicate that experience through a conversation and a couple of photographs.

Still, it offered something useful: an opportunity to examine my wardrobe choices more consciously.

I realised that I already have a fairly consistent personal style. I favour streamlined bottoms, relaxed tops, comfortable shoes and understated elegance.

Perhaps I don't need to reinvent my wardrobe after all.

I just need to be more deliberate about how I put everything together.

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Another blog post that I wrote a few months ago, which I find quite interesting when I read it again: What AI Thinks My Personality Is (After Two Years of Conversations)