However, when I was 12 years old, my mother decided to receive the gospel, believed into the Lord Jesus and was baptized after attending a gospel meeting. One month later, my father was baptized. Then, half a year later, it was my turn to be baptized. I was 12, going to be 13. My life has changed ever since.
We call this the Lord's sovereign arrangement.
I have always remember 2 verses:

Gen. 6:5 "The LORD saw how great man's wickedness on the earth had become, and that every inclination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil all the time." (NIV)
I have always been a good girl, simple-minded, and I consider myself brainy although I'm not really a nerd or a geek. But then, I'm not a beauty queen material either. So, I seek to enhance my strong points. Whenever I read "...every inclination of the thoughts of his (men) heart was only evil all the time," I seek not to be bad-hearted. I seek to please everyone. I seek to project myself as a caring person despite my plain looks.
Until today, I still think the Lord answers with this verse:
1 Sam. 16:7 "But the LORD said to Samuel, 'Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.'" (NIV)
Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.
In the big world out there, I realize that people tend to focus first on outward appearance, of which I lack. Men (as in mankind) are visual-oriented. People are easily drawn to beautiful things/persons/matters. A nice outward appearance/image/branding/packaging definitely boost up one's portfolio and it provides a shortcut for a better impression upon others.
Since I lack this, I focus more on my inward content. I don't mean I'm full of content. But I think I rely upon my strong inner points as a replacement to what I lack outwardly. That's why my working attitude is untolerable by some because I regard responsibility, accountability, efficiency, productivity, consistencies, management, reputation, punctuality, and quality very highly.
One will take a LONG, LONG time to know what's within me...
I don't mind...
Just as time heals, time also proves...
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